sometimes you have to slap those mean people around a little

So I've been told I have to post something to get the picture of the cycloptic cat out of Sheena's nightmares. Here goes:

I was at the grocery store last night (the local C-TownTownTown), getting the things i'd forgotten to get in the freshdirect order, and i got in line behind this woman. she was the only person at the register and, at the time, i couldn't figure out why there wasn't a line behind her (because the rest of the registers had super long lines). I got clued in pretty quick, though, when i saw that with one hand she was drinking an Ozzie soda, and with the other hand she was slowly and delicately placing items from her cart onto the rolly moving counter thing. more often than not, she'd ask the poor girl at the register to do a price check, and then ponder whether or not she wanted to buy the bottle of allspice.

After a few minutes of this the Chinese man behind me leaned around me and asked (a little brusquely) "Do you need help?" to which the mean lady replied, "No, I don't need help! I'm ringing up my food! " In response, the Chinese man said (what we were all thinking, obviously), "well hurry up! we're all waiting for you."

now, i know you know how hectic a grocery store can be at 6pm, when everyone's just finally gotten back into brooklyn and all they want to do is buy their huge amount of starchy carb-loaded breads and get the hell home (ok, maybe people other than me don't live on bread and hummus, but come on people, it's going to rot in my fridge). so the people behind me were stewing, and the woman in front of me was mumbling to herself, yelling at the manager who was standing next to her and the poor girl who was at the register about how she was a customer and how dare people talk to her like that and she was getting stuff delivered and blah blah blah.

i took this moment to turn off my music and take off my headphones so that i could more fully participate in whatever riot was about to happen.

So the woman is finishing up with her ringing up. and she leaves a fairly full cart blocking the way through the aisle. so i ask her, "are you finished with the cart?" and she looks at me like i'm the shit on her shoe and says, "yes", so i start to move it out of the way. at which point she yells WAIT! and reaches in and grabs a clove of garlic. and then she says, ok. like i was trying to steal her garlic.

finally she's rung up and the girl at the register gives her the delivery form to fill out. while she's writing down her address she turns to the Chinese man behind me and says, "You know, you should just go back where you came from. I was born here." ARE YOU SERIOUS??? PEOPLE ACTUALLY SAY THAT??

I let that sink into my brain for a few seconds, weighing the amazingly horrific with the fear of confrontation, until i just couldn't take it any more. i told her that was incredibly uncalled for. (and immediately got super nervous, started sweating copiously, and all of the blood drained from my face). she replied, "i'm sorry, but that's what the world is coming to these days." and, as i was on a roll, i told her that was ridiculous, that she had taken her damn time and she just needed to fill out the delivery form so we could all get out of the store and go home.

I felt pretty ok after that. and she proceeded to enter her pin in the keypad (hiding it from me because i was obviously going to see what her code was and steal her money), and left. the whole time yelling about how she was being treated, and being told by the girl at the register and the manager to get the hell out of the store.

it was pretty awesome.

i mean, i'm not a brave person, but sometimes it feels really good to stand up to crazy brooklyn women who think they own steve's c-town. which they don't.

fin.